they don't talk to me anymore. and its strange to say that its okay. i guess the only emotion the result of their neglect has brought to me is curiosity. i wonder why i'm now the outcast. i will never know until i ask... which i may or may not do.


500 days of summer was heart-breaking. even my cold, typically unemotional best friend Dessislava felt its impact. indie cliche? yes. worth watching? yes. i do admit that i left the theater eager to see Precious, which comes out November 09.


luckily, i feel better than i have felt in months. sense New York, i have felt so refreshed! Trinity time is always therapeutic. Seeing beloved roommate candice schottenloher also aided in putting a smile on my face. i love her, and during the saddest period of life i had ever endured, she was the only tangible person there for me. she's a blessing. obviously.

school starts august 24th, exciting.


him and i have been having fun together. we've gone out twice and both times i have enjoyed myself. no pressure, just comfort. i'm attempting to remain unattached and to get out unscaved despite what happens. but i'm failing. i enjoy his company too much, i'm too attracted, and i like that he seems to care as well (?). things are slow moving. i fear being percieved as uninteresting, or uninterested. my previous male experience has me flustered and paranoid. so flustered that i've been having frequent stomach aches that root from the butterflies that root from my fear of dissappointment. i'm excited, and (literally) sickeningly terrified.